An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor’s cute then forget the fruit!
Gambling is an excellent way of getting nothing for something.
Eat and drink with your relatives; do business with strangers.
Don’t worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you
A married man should forget his mistakes; There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing.
If you think your boss is stupid, remember; you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.
If you want your children to listen to you, try talking softly to someone else.
Instructions on how to keep an idiot busy: Read instructions again
I wish all my electronics came with as much memory as a girlfriend or wife
I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought, what good would that do?
Health plans are like hospital gowns…You only think you’re covered.
People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first.
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
I can’t face my checkbook so I check my Facebook
If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
If it’s free, it’s advice; If you pay for it, it’s counseling; If you can use either one, it’s a miracle !
Some people are wise, and some, otherwise.
Clearly, you are a person with an open mind. I can feel the breeze from here.
She: I spend hours in front of the mirror admiring my beauty. Do you think that’s vanity? He: No. I think that’s imagination
Google turned 12 this year, so now we have 1 more year to use it before it turns into a teenager and wont answer anything!
Gambling is an excellent way of getting nothing for something.
Eat and drink with your relatives; do business with strangers.
Don’t worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you
A married man should forget his mistakes; There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing.
If you think your boss is stupid, remember; you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.
If you want your children to listen to you, try talking softly to someone else.
Instructions on how to keep an idiot busy: Read instructions again
I wish all my electronics came with as much memory as a girlfriend or wife
I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought, what good would that do?
Health plans are like hospital gowns…You only think you’re covered.
People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first.
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
I can’t face my checkbook so I check my Facebook
If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
If it’s free, it’s advice; If you pay for it, it’s counseling; If you can use either one, it’s a miracle !
Some people are wise, and some, otherwise.
Clearly, you are a person with an open mind. I can feel the breeze from here.
She: I spend hours in front of the mirror admiring my beauty. Do you think that’s vanity? He: No. I think that’s imagination
Google turned 12 this year, so now we have 1 more year to use it before it turns into a teenager and wont answer anything!
